Jemma's 1st Day of School

Well, as I sit at my computer this morning by myself, I have so many emotions coursing through my mind and body! Just three weeks ago on this day we walked into an orphanage office in China, half-a-world-away and met our new 12-year-old daughter for the very first time. A smile and confidence radiating from her personality from that very first day and she has been smiling ever since. As we wait for the happy honeymoon to be over and for this child to finally meltdown from all the changes that have taken place in her life over the past 3 weeks, the meltdown doesn't come. Can this be real? Is Jemma just going to glide through this transition in her life like a piece of cake? Will she grieve the loss she has experienced or is she counting this change all as gain? Was she prepared so well in China for this moment that she knew what to expect? Did they tell her "don't rock the boat" or "make your new parents happy" so they will keep you? 

So many questions run through my brain this morning and will remain unanswered for now and that is okay. Only 3 weeks have I had this child in my arms, my home, and my life and today....I hugged her goodbye, told her I loved her, and took her to her first day of 6th Grade at the Middle School. I think I am quite possibly more distressed than she is, but that is okay. God is answering so many prayers and He has been so faithful to guide us through each step of this adoption process and I know He will be there next to us up to the very end. After I dropped her off, on my drive home, God gave me what I needed to hear in a Matthew West song called "Strong Enough" that was on the radio. Here are a few of the lyrics:

You must, you must think I'm strong

To give me what I'm going through

Well forgive me, forgive me if I 'm wrong

But this looks like more than I can do on my own

I know I'm not strong enough to be

everything that I'm supposed to be

I give up; I'm not strong enough

Hands of mercy won't you cover me

Lord, right now I'm asking you to be

strong enough, for the both of us.

I know I don't have to be strong enough for this task, but rather....I can do all things, through Christ who gives me strength. 

I look at this "little" girl who is half grown up, who only has 7 years of school before she graduates from high school and I am sad to have not had more time with her, but overjoyed that God has given us the privilege to be her Mom and Dad for as long as we have life! As I have learned over the past 18 years of raising my own children from birth...that it is so important to treasure each and every moment for we never know when that last moment will be! We have promised Jemma that we will be there for her forever; there will be good and bad, ups and downs, triumphs and challenges....but we are a family and we will make it through together! 

"Family" has become such a very important word in Jemma's daily vocabulary and she is absolutely thrilled that our family is all hers; she now has a forever family! This tiny word and what it represents for Jemma, reminds me of how much I value family and how so many times we all take our families for granted and don't reach out nearly as much as we should....life gets in the way.

Yesterday, as we took Jemma to church for the very first time...I was just asking God to be with her, to comfort her when it was time for the singing and the sermon when she would have no understanding of what was being said. A foreign language...church and God....totally foreign concepts to this orphan child. Yet, she is a child of God...made in His image...loved immeasurably by Him! Even though she didn't know the words to the songs...she sang along. Even though she didn't know what Cody was preaching...she had her Mandarin/English New Testament open and was reading it. Even though she didn't know why Shon and I took her with us up to the front of the church during the Invitation at the end...she walked willingly down the aisle with us. Even though she didn't know why Shon and I were crying as we introduced her to our church family, thanked them for blessing us with food and prayer while we were gone on our trip, and spoke of our God-led adoption journey....Jemma cried tears with us. 

And it is my heartfelt prayer today, that one day she will know who Jesus Christ is, what He did for her, and that she will accept Him as her personal Savior over her life one day soon! Just as God adopts us into His family, we have followed the calling to adopt God's orphans, and humbly walk this life according to His plan. Thank you Jesus!

Dear Lord, I lift Jemma Yanping Gerber up to you today and ask that you surround her with love and comfort on her first day of school, in a foreign country with a foreign language, American food and a new family. Though there will be frustrations, help her to embrace a new language and this new life. May new friendships abound and may her smile shine even more brightly today than yesterday. Help us to be the very best parents for her as we strive to lead her, teach her, encourage her, love her, help her, and be a shining light when it seems dark and when challenges arise, lift her to rise to the challenge and may she become everything that she is meant to be! In Jesus name, Amen.

We love you all so much! Thank you for always supporting our "crazy" plans, for praying for us, for lending a hand and for loving us!

Blessed Mama of 6